Lost hope and Sunshine

Its so often that we indulge in wishful thinking for what we don't have and are ungrateful for what we have. My bad, but yes, I am the same. Very often, I crib about my college or having no friends or having food which I don't like at all. Very often, I crib about me being fat and I crib about my family too. It is my utter inanity that I can't really be thankful. Even once. I cried in my college that day, out of sheer frustration and boredom. I see these three blind girls in my college, everyday. I decided not to make a fool of myself any more and took refuge at gazing at them through window. No, I don't know their names and don't even which year they belong to, which course. Anyhow, I saw two girls happily holding each other, giving each other support. One holding a plate of rajma chawal, other one holding a plate of kachori aloo. Where they went, I don't know. After the class got over, I saw the third girl I see often, hit an open door, I rushed to be at her side and she asked me to take her to the college office, she had to get some papers signed. The office, being a govt. Office, refused as usual. She then asked me to take her to the library. She held me as I took lead. On reaching library, she bid me goodbye by saying- why are you so sad? I didn't speak a word to her and she knew! Did she? Really? She went her way and I was dumbfound.

I see these people everyday, I used to crib against the reservation system for religious communities but not for them. I see them entering our college everyday now, see them smile, feel their empowerment. I see them walk through the college, to their class. God knows how they climb stairs, they are used to it, I guess. I can never ever imagine myself being that way, or adjusting so well, not complaining. I don't know how they go home or come to college, a special cab or parents picking them up or buses, its a few minutes encounter in college. I smile at them, they don't smile back. I remember when one of them danced at the freshers talent hunt at mujhe rang de and I had goosebumps. It requires courage to be on stage and seems that they had it. Steve jobs once said- your time is limited on earth. Try making most of it. I want to say,  sure time is limited but abilities are unlimited and I now make sure that I don't waste it. I write. Whenever I can. Whatever I can. I do my bit to be remembered. And whenever I am on the brink of being a nihilist, I remember those girls. I don't remember the last time I saw good in others. And guess what? I am happy. :)

Ananya